Lasting Friendships

This weekend we had a barbeque with some of my long time friends. We brought together a group of friends that haven’t seen each other in 15-20years. Though I’ve seen some of them off and on we haven’t stayed connected the way we should have, Rick hadn’t even met some. When you do something like this memories fly back into your mind making you feel almost like a teenager again and taking you back to another life. Alina, the redhead was my best friend growing up, we met in first grade. We just reconnected after a 15 year separation and it’s like we never were apart. As always we have promised to stay in touch and I think this time we will, we are all mature enough to realize how quickly time flies and how important true friends, old and new, are to our lives.

Carmen

Thank you for your insight & honesty re: Fear of Failure

THANK YOU FOR YOUR COMMENTS! To All Of You That Posted Comments Re: Fear of Failure:

Thank you for your insights and personal experiences. The concepts of failing, and conversely success, often generate an array of emotions. What motivates us to succeed is extremely important. I agree with the majority of you who commented that fear of failure often motivates us to successses. Some of our greatest inventors, business people, teachers, doctors, attorneys, politicians (and the list goes on and on) have succeeded after one or many failures. They have learned from mistakes and have been energized by their frustrations and disappointments. Where would we be today without their vision and self-assured drive? Your comments have reinforced that many of us use fearing failure as a positive tool. Fewer are disabled or immobilized by failure, but this phenomenon does occur. As one of you wrote, setting lower expectations helps one avoid failure; is this really a solution?

I appreciate your reading the Step-Forum blog. Carmen and I try to write about interesting topics as much as we can, and we post almost daily so subscribe today! Please also visit our website.

Dr. Rick

"Greatness"

I've been watching the Olympics for the past week, as I'm sure many of you have. I'm impressed by the athlete's dedication, commitment, and skill, but also, their teamwork and support of their families and friends. It seems as if each one of them has a contingent of people who love and care about them, regardless of the result. Wouldn't it be great if we all had this unending, relatively unconditional support for us in our endeavors. Wouldn't life be a little easier if there were people cheering for us? Or, maybe like the world-class athlete, we need to muster up our courage, motivation, and drive from within ourselves. An important lesson--although it's nice to have others acknowlege our "greatness," it's more important that we acknowledge it ourselves. Have a week of "greatness."
Dr. Rick

Happy Birthday!

My wife, my stepdaughter, and I are going to Orlando this weekend to see my stepson. It's his birthday on Tuesday so we'll celebrate with him a couple of days early. Along with holidays, special events like birthdays are really tough when a loved one lives out of town. Lucky for us he's only 3 hours away, but I can surely empathize with those of you who have family in other states or even across the country. Of course, I could send him a "stepcard," but delivering our message in person is much better. Happy Birthday Lino!

Some advice for Stepkids

I’ve gotten a few emails from kids who live with one parent (usually their mother) and they feel “out of place” when they visit with their other parent (usually their father). Sometimes it’s awkward because their father has remarried and they’re not sure what to expect from their new stepmother. Other times, and this is obviously more serious, their father has married someone who has kids from her first marriage, so they don’t feel welcomed. Maybe you don’t even have a room or special place in your Dad’s new house. It’s a common circumstance, and so a common feeling, but I understand it doesn’t feel good. What can you do? Talk with your Dad. Let him know how you feel. Don’t assume he knows what you’re experiencing. In fact, he probably doesn’t see it at all! I know your Dad doesn’t live with your Mom anymore, but I bet he still loves you just the same. Good luck!
Dr. Rick

Send us your favorite Pictures!

Send your favorite pictures to us at carmen@thestepcardcollection.com. We will post them on Dr. Rick’s Step-Forum (we reserve the right to decline inappropriate pictures). Don’t forget to put subtitles with them so we know who you are and where you are! What a great way to share your stepfamily experiences and triumphs with other subscribers. This might also be a good time to share your thoughts and feelings through the Story Page on the website. We always look forward to communicating with you.
Have a great day!
Dr. Rick

Stepparent "Identity"

Stepparent "Identity"

Is there a difference in the way a stepparent is perceived
depending on the childrens' life stage? What I mean by this is,
in my experience, a stepparent that enters the scene when the
kids are older is more likely to be defined as a "step" parent
than one who marries in when the kids are young. There are
obviously other factors too, such as how involved is the
non-custodial biological parent and how equipped is the new stepparent to begin with. But all in all, I wonder if others have experienced a specific distinction based on when you married into the family. Let me know what you think.
Dr. Rick

Father's Day

Father's Day.
Father's Day is June 15th this year. That would be my father's 83rd birthday. A two for one! He passed away 9 years ago tomorrow. We had a great relationship. We played tennis and golf together, although he wasn't that good at either. It didn't matter. I miss him alot, but I'm never sad about it. We talked and shared a great deal (not everything, of course), but enough to know how we felt about each other. My relationship with my
Dad wasn't perfect, or maybe in its way it was. Take the
opportunity to say and do the things with people you love while
you have the chance. To all you Dads and Stepdads out
there--Have a great day!
Dr. Rick

A Tribute to Mothers

May 11th is Mother’s Day this year. Let’s face it, most mothers deserve praise all year round, but rarely get it! Manytimes their deeds are taken for granted, and their family commitment and dedication is unmatched. In today’s society many mothers are part of the workforce outside the home as well as within it. Their jobs are usually extended way beyond the 9 to 5 timeframe. We do things to please our mothers and elicit their acknowledgement and recognition, but do we reciprocate?

Time is short and precious. Be sure to say and do what’s necessary to make the relationship with your mother a significant one. Now if you have a stepmother, too …....Happy Mother’s Day!

Dr. Rick

Dr. Rick LIVE on the RADIO!

Hello Everyone!

NOW AVAILABLE ON OUR WEBSITE AT http://www.thestepcardcollection.com/.
Click on NEWS and then click on 'On the Airwaves'. You can listen to the interview directly from the site. Updated April 9, 2008.

Just a quick heads-up. Our radio interview with Charlie Kaufman will air today, Wednesday, December 19th on WDNA radio 88.9FM at 11AM EST. The best way to get the broadcast is to go to their website. www.wdna.org

Thank you all,

Dr. Rick

Easter's Right Around The Corner

Easter is early this year so preparations for the holiday have already begun. I wonder if your family is planning a big dinner? I know that in past years my family had to make arrangements to coordinate meal times, accomodating the childrens' attending our dinner and their biological father's family dinner in the same day (talk about calories!). My stepchildren are older now so they can work this stuff out for themselves, but when children are younger and they need to be taxied back and forth on occasions like this, it can get complicated. Of course, the bottom line is that each family, old and new, gets to spend important time together. But, I certainly remember how hectic is was for us. Hope you all have a happy Easter. FYI, Passover begins on April 19th. Different religion, same story. It's amazing how alike we really are!
Dr. Rick

thestepcardcollection Launches Premier Collection of Quality, Printed Cards

"Just for Stepfamilies"

http://www.thestepcardcollection.com/ the premier online resource for sentiment, occasion and greeting cards for stepfamilies has successfully launched its first collection of quality, PRINTED holiday, occasion and sentiment cards created specifically for stepfamilies.

The first group of 24 high-quality, printed cards (printed on recycled paper) was written by Dr. Rick, illustrated by Belgian Artist Caroline Geys and Designed by Miami-based design team BE IT Designs. "The cards are fresh, spirited, humorous and playful in design and pack the same sentimental and communicative punch as our collection of online cards" said Dr. Rick. For more information on how to get these wonderful cards - please contact us at sales@thestepcardcollection.com. To obtain the full press release please contact: Media contacts: Lisa Silvera/Christopher Hughes info@thinkkingmedia.com.

What are your experiences?

When I first became a stepfather my stepkids were already teenagers. It was extremely difficult to come into the family and be a parent—giving directives, setting limits, enforcing rules—until their mother gave me explicit authority to do so.

I’ve found that this permission is essential to make the relationship work. I can’t say that it worked perfectly, far from it—but it really helped. I wonder if it might have been a bit different if the kids were younger when I married their Mom. What are your experiences? I’d love to hear from you.

Dr Rick

You Tube Holiday Greeting from www.thestepcardcollection.com

"Special cards for stepfamilies"

For immediate release: (7 November 2007 - Miami, Florida)

Announcing the online launch of http://www.thestepcardcollection.com/. The premiere, interactive online greeting and sentiment card website loaded with only the best in holiday, occasion and sentiment e-cards designed just for step-families. Finally! A site that specifically acknowledges the feelings, challenges and special situations unique to step-families.

www.thestepcardcollection.com was created by a Psychologist and Step-Father in Miami Lakes, Florida. Newly married, he found that traditional greeting cards were incapable of expressing his true feelings for his new wife and step-children so he began creating his own cards for them. He decided to turn his personal project into a way to help other families with similar circumstances share their unique sentiments.

Catering specifically to step families and their unique emotional and communication challenges and triumphs, http://www.thestepcardcollection.com/ is an accessible, fun and tasteful resource brimming with e-cards, postcards, calendars, birthday alerts, reminders, address book and personal picture and message upload capabilities, family friendly games, and so much more.

A section of particular interest is Dr. Rick's Step-Forum, a featured section of http://www.thestepcardcollection.com/ that is informational, inspirational, and interactive. Have a question for Dr. Rick? Want to share pertinent information or data with families like yours? "Dr. Rick's Step-Forum is just the place.

Designed by progressive Miami & San Antonio based interactive and comprehensive web development force, http://www.iconnect2it.com/, the site touts a bold, modern look and sensible user friendly & innovative, category-specific navigation. Inventive promotional marketing will include ongoing promotional subscription incentives: compelling card images, sound and music scape's, a wide array of background & skin choices, sample e-card and postcard display; and an overall fresh, sophisticated design that showcases the sites expansive selection of quality, relevant e-cards.

Said Dr. Rick, "this website is for everyone who is a member of a step family. I hope this collection of greetings will convey what you, too, have been thinking or feeling."

http://www.thestepcardcollection.com/ was created with you and your special family in mind. Step-families comprise a substantial segment of today's society, but receive very little representation or consideration when it comes to greeting cards.

While traditional families can celebrate holiday's and birthdays with greeting cards that may perfectly express their sentiments, step-families could not - until now. http://www.thestepcardcollection.com/ provides a loving and objective voice for step-family members to address each with sensitivity and sincerity without being too corny or painfully predictable.

Original, relevant and heartfelt step-family cards like you dream about - right at your fingertips.

Welcome to http://www.thestepcardcollection.com/